


Crush

by hockeylvr59 (gleefanatic)



Category: Men's Hockey RPF
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-05-17
Updated: 2020-05-17
Packaged: 2021-03-03 02:41:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,775
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24227527
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/gleefanatic/pseuds/hockeylvr59
Relationships: Matthew Tkachuk/Reader
Kudos: 3





	1. Chapter 1

The cool air of the rink was the same. The feeling of his skates cutting through the ice was the same. The sound of sticks on pucks and his teammates chirping was the same. Everything about today’s practice was the same except for one thing…

Practice had started five minutes ago and his favorite team photographer wasn’t in her normal spot on the bench. 

Matthew couldn’t recall the last time that y/n had missed a practice. Her presence was such a part of the routine by now that for some reason her absence left him feeling bothered. Standing at the blue line, Matthew tried to pay attention to his coach’s instructions, determined to push past this unsettled feeling. Skating hard toward the net, he buried a puck past Rittich, a flash of movement from the bench catching his eye as he returned to his previous spot. Before he could assure himself that it was her, that everything was back to normal, Gelinas had pulled him aside wanting to chat about his shot and how to improve his game when breakout chances occurred. 

By the time Coach had finished with him, the next drill had already started. Taking a moment to figure out what was going on, Matthew settled himself at the back of the line before finally taking the chance to glance over at the bench. His heart settled back into place at the realization that the movement had been just who he was hoping it was. In the same millisecond, his jaw dropped as he realized that while she held her camera in one hand, snapping away like usual, things weren’t exactly normal. No…normally y/n didn’t have a baby resting on her hip. 

Lost in thought, Matt didn’t even realize that he was next in line for the drill until Johnny was shoving him from behind. And although Matt attempted to focus and participate in practice, there was one question that wouldn’t leave his mind.

_She has a kid?_

You see, while Y/N was a staple at Flames practices, Matt had never actually really talked to her before. Of course, he’d occasionally hover over her shoulder to comment on the photos of him she’d taken, but he really didn’t know anything about her personal life. Admittedly, he had made a point to observe a lack of any rings on her left hand but now…seeing her with a baby made him realize that that observation really meant little to nothing at all. 

Partway through practice, Matthew had watched TJ Brodie skate over to her during a forward-only drill and he watched as she chatted with him, a smile on her face as she adjusted the kid against her side who appeared to cling tighter to her. From the other side of the rink, Gio watched as his young assistant captain eyed their photographer, his obvious crush ever more apparent. No one had said anything to him about the crush yet, but maybe it was finally time to give him a little shove in the right direction. 

A modified scrimmage was set up to conclude the on-ice practice and for a while, Matthew lost himself in the game, forgetting about y/n and the baby on the bench. It wasn’t until the puck deflected oddly off of someone’s stick and he heard a feminine screech of pain that it all came flooding back. Over on the bench, y/n was shaking out her right arm frantically, her fingers clenching into a fist and releasing repeatedly. With play stopped and Ward checking to make sure she was okay, Matthew couldn’t help but listen as she assured his coach that she was fine, that she was more worried about the baby and the camera than taking a bouncing puck to the arm. Still, he noticed the grimace on her face and a rush of anger filled him at the thought of her being hurt. It was a stupid feeling because it was a fluky play and while he cursed himself for it, it was an emotion he was finding hard to control. 

By the time he looked over at the bench again, she was gone, clearly not willing to risk another stray puck flying her way when she really wasn’t able to protect herself. 

The nagging feeling that he should go check on her followed him into the locker room as Matthew stripped out of his gear. He’d have a few minutes between grabbing a shower and the team film session if he was quick. But as he stood in the shower he told himself that it would be ridiculous and weird if he tracked her down. After all, they weren’t friends and the last thing he needed was for his teammates to give him hell over it. 

Still, after throwing on some sweats and a t-shirt, Matt found himself standing in the middle of the hallway, his brain telling him to head to film, while his heart pulled the other way. Caught in a mental debate, he missed Gio walking down the hall from the training room until he was hit in the chest with something thrown by his captain. Catching it, he looked up confused as to why he had an ice pack and a roll of elastic bandage wrap now in his hands. 

“She’s down the hall. Go help her wrap the ice pack around her arm.” Gio directed. 

“Wait. What?” Matt found slipping from his lips. 

“Chuck…she has a kid, not the plague.” Gio declared. “Now go before I have to watch you debate whether you should for a minute longer.” 

“I wasn’t…” Matt attempted to defend himself but Gio just walked away shaking his head before Matt could finish his sentence. Sighing to himself, Matt adjusted the items in his grip before turning down the hall where Gio had pointed, finding y/n sitting on the ground just around the corner with her back against the wall, computer propped up on a box and baby sleeping on her chest. 

Running his fingers through his hair, Matt sighed before approaching, the sound of his footsteps causing y/n to look in his direction. 

“So uh…Gio sent me with an ice pack for your arm.” Matt stated, his voice cracking, driving him completely nuts. 

“Thank you.” She whispered back softly, her lips dropping down to press against the baby’s head in an effort to ensure that it didn’t wake up. Now that he was closer Matthew noticed the pink clothes and though it was gender-biased, he took that to mean that this was a little girl. Unmoving for a moment, Matthew just Y/N with her daughter until she reached up for the ice pack. 

“Oh uh…can I help you? Gio sent a bandage wrap to keep it in place so you didn’t have to hold it.” Matt found himself rambling, something else that was so unlike his normal behavior. When she nodded, he found himself smiling, dropping into a squat beside her and taking the offered arm. “Did you get hit on the front of the arm…or the side?” He questioned, unable to see any signs of bruising as she wore long sleeves. 

“It hit here.” She pointed out, grazing her hand along her daughter’s head as she returned her free hand to the baby’s back. With appropriate direction, it only took a minute or two for Matt to secure the ice pack, and once he was done, he stood back up, his fingers tangling in his hair again. 

“Well…you should be all set.” He stated. “And I should head to film.” Shoving his hands into the pockets of his sweats he turned to walk away, only pausing when he heard her melodic voice say his name. 

“Thanks Matt.” She murmured and it was sad that those two words alone caused his chest to swell. 

As he settled into film he had so many new questions. He had to remind himself that they weren’t any of his business and that his business was to focus on the screen in front of him and not on how gentle she was with her daughter or how wonderful her voice sounded speaking his name. He’d be chirped for weeks if the guys knew where his head was at and he had a reputation to uphold. 

___

By the time they finished watching film, Matt was ready to go grab something to eat before hitting the gym for some weights. Detouring back to the locker room for his forgotten phone, Matt had to walk down by where y/n had situated herself in order to get to the player’s lounge. As he passed the side hallway where he’d see her just an hour or so before he once again heard his name, this time being called out with more volume and energy. 

Though his stomach was growling, Matt was unable to keep walking and so he stopped and turned down the hallway finding Y/N standing over a now awake child. 

“Oh Matt…thank god.” She declared. “Can you do me a massive favor and watch Lottie for a minute while I use the bathroom?” Her words came out in such a rush that by the time his brain processed them she was looking at him expectantly, bouncing on her toes. 

“I don’t…” He started and for the second time today, his protests were being cut off.

“Please?? Just make sure she doesn’t go walking away.” Apparently his body language signaled his agreement because immediately she smiled and kneeled down next to the little girl. 

“Mommy will be right back. Stay here with Mr. Tkachuk and behave. I’m coming right back after using the bathroom.” Though the little girl whined for a moment she eventually nodded at Y/N and with that the woman who was driving him crazy disappeared down the hall leaving him with her daughter. 

If Matt were honest, he didn’t know the first thing about kids and so he stood just watching ‘Lottie’ as she stared back up at him with big brown eyes. Feeling awkward he eventually slid himself to the floor, leaning against the wall, his gaze remaining on the baby as if she would magically vanish if he so much as blinked. 

Y/N had been gone far longer than a minute and Matt found himself glancing down the hallway to see if she was on her way back when he felt two tiny hands pressing down on his thigh as the little girl plopped herself down right next to him, a book lying beside her. As she settled herself, she reached for the book before attempting to hand it to him. 

“M. Chuck…ook peas.” She requested, those big brown eyes staring into his once more. Gently taking the book from her, Matthew opened it and just stared at the page until it clicked that she wanted him to read to her. It was a children’s book, one which had maybe five words a page and so he complied, telling her about the cat and the rat and the bat and the hat. As he turned each page he couldn’t help but marvel at the look that crossed Lottie’s face and as he finished, he nearly jumped hearing Y/N’s voice above him. 

“Tell Mr. Tkachuk thank you Lottie.” With a giggle, the little girl nodded and Matt watched as she brought her fingertips to her chin before moving it away, palm up. 

“Tank u” She babbled before pulling herself up and throwing herself at her mom’s legs. 

“Yes. Thank you.” Y/N echoed, as Matt set the book down and pulled himself to his feet. 

“Was that sign language?” He asked, not even realizing how random of a question that was until it had been asked. 

“It was. She started learning sign language as a way to communicate before she could talk.” Y/N explained. “She doesn’t really need it now, but I think she enjoys it because she pairs it with her words still.” Matt merely nodded in response, his hands finding their way back to his pockets once more. 

“Seriously thank you for watching her. My bladder was about to burst.” Y/N explained. “She’s been so clingy today because she’s teething again and with hand, foot, and mouth disease going around her daycare I had no choice but to bring her with me today and I did not realize how hard it would be to have a clingy sixteen-month-old attached to my hip as I tried to work.” 

“It’s no problem,” Matt assured her, though his brain was now spinning with all of the information she had just thrown at him. She had answered some of his questions, but there were still many more lingering. 

As he lifted weights an hour later, Matthew missed the looks his teammates were giving him as he watched Y/N between reps as she flowed easily between taking pictures of the Flames in the gym and capturing snapshots of her daughter who was trapped into a corner with plyo boxes working on a puzzle. No one commented on the smile that appeared on his face as he watched Lottie bounce on her toes as she called out for her mom to show off her finished foam puzzle, but that didn’t mean that they weren’t storing up ammunition to chirp him later. 

If things went the way the vets had a feeling they would, there would be plenty of time to do just that in the future.


	2. Chapter 2

With the team flying out of town the morning following his hallway encounters with Y/N, Matt didn’t see her for the next week because she didn’t travel with the team. Her lack of travel now made sense to Matthew and though he missed seeing her smile, it was definitely better for Lottie that her mom remains in Calgary. Of course, just because he didn’t see her didn’t mean that she didn’t occupy his brain. While knowing that Lottie was sixteen-months-old answered a few questions, that knowledge also spawned even more. For example, Matthew couldn’t help but wonder about the circumstances behind Y/N becoming a mother and whether motherhood meant that she was in a relationship. 

They weren’t questions he’d be able to ask though, so he told himself that he had to assume that Y/N was in a relationship and get over his own silly feelings because it was never going to happen. The problem was…just telling yourself that didn’t mean that it was going to happen and Matt was rudely reminded of that fact when he arrived back in the locker room following the road trip. Before he’d even reached his stall, Matthew noticed a piece of paper sitting on the bench portion. A closer examination revealed a scratchy piece of artwork, post-it note stuck to the bottom corner. 

_Matt,_

_Lottie drew this to say thank you for reading to her. You don’t know how much that small gesture means to both of us and Lottie keeps asking when she can see ‘M. Chuck’ again. I know getting a child’s picture probably seems silly but Lottie would give me hell if I didn’t make sure you got it._

_Y/N_

Matt didn’t notice the grin on his face growing as he read the note but he did feel the snap of a towel against his ass which made him jump. 

“You gonna get ready for practice or daydream about your girl?” Noah Hanifin chirped as he walked back to his own stall, towel slung over his shoulder. 

“Shut the fuck up.” Matt snapped back, a glare now covering his face. No one dared say anything further, most even headed out to the ice a few minutes early while Matt quickly changed. The part of him that wanted his teammates to lay off him told him to toss the picture into the trash but for some reason he slid it into his bag instead, hanging it up with a magnet on his fridge when he got home. There was something about having a child’s artwork on the fridge that made his modern apartment feel a little bit more like a home. 

_____

With the schedule ramping up, Matt had honestly lost track of his days. He’d seen Y/N in passing, and each time he did he cursed at the way his body reacted but he hadn’t spoken with her. Today though, Coach had canceled practice in lieu of a family skate and secretly Matthew was hoping that Y/N would show up. 

Sitting in his stall in just a pair of sweats and a hoodie, Matthew laced up his skates, nervous energy radiating from him. The locker room was a madhouse with all of the guys’ kids running around in their skates and various layers of gear. Sitting in the stall next to him for a moment TJ worked on fixing his daughter’s hair. 

“She’ll be here.” He declared nonchalantly. “She’s bringing Lottie to skate.” TJ didn’t say anything more as he scooped his daughter up and carried her toward the ice. 

By the time Matt made his own way out to the ice, he noticed Y/N already skating around taking some pictures of the players and their families. TJ had said she was bringing Lottie but there were no signs of the little girl around anywhere. Before Matthew could even debate skating over to her he was pulled into a game of tag with some of the other kids. It wasn’t until he heard a familiar toddler voice shouting “mama!” that he looked back toward the bench only to find Y/N skating in the direction of her daughter who was in the arms of a man about his own age. He watched as she leaned up to kiss the man’s cheek, soft smile on her face as his worst fears came to life right in front of his eyes. 

***

Hearing her daughter’s voice, Y/N let her camera fall from her hands to hang on its strap around her neck as she skated to the bench. Seeing that she had her mom’s attention Lottie started squirming in her father’s hands, reaching out for her mom. When Y/N reached the pair she leaned in and kissed Lottie’s head before pressing her lips against Christopher’s cheek. 

“Hey! Thank you for dropping her off.” Y/N greeted as she pulled away. 

“You know it’s not a problem Y/N.” Christopher insisted. “I have class anyway so I’d just be taking her to daycare.” Y/N was well aware of this fact but still, she was grateful nonetheless because this was one of her favorite things to do with her daughter. 

“Still..thank you.” She repeated, taking the toddler who was reaching out for her wanting to be transferred to mom’s arms. They chatted for a minute about how things had been going before Chris leaned in and kissed Lottie’s head before pulling back. 

“You’ll text me when you’re ready to have her back?” Y/N asked and Chris nodded, running his fingers through his short straight hair. 

“Sure thing.” He agreed. “But uh. I’m gonna go before your boy over there comes and takes my head off.” With a teasing grin, he motioned over to where Matthew Tkachuk was indeed watching them. 

“I have no idea what you’re talking about.” Y/N mumbled, a blush forming on her cheeks. 

“Uh-huh…sure sweetheart.” Chris threw back as he started backing his way down the tunnel. 

‘Oh fuck you.’ Y/N mouthed. “Go ask that hot guy from your seminar to coffee or something after class.” She threw back winking at him as she shifted her daughter in her arms. With a laugh and a wave, Chris disappeared and Y/N shook her head turning her attention to Lottie. 

“Are you ready to go skating?” She asked, her own grin growing. 

“yeah! ‘Kate mama!” Lottie replied, clapping her hands. So after slipping her camera back into its bag under the bench, Y/N sat Lottie down and grabbed the skates that TJ Brodie had brought for her to borrow, his daughter just a little older than Lottie and one size up in skates. With Lottie’s skates ready to go, Y/N picked her daughter back up. 

“Do you wanna skate with mama first or on your own?” Y/N asked and when Lottie insisted she wanted to skate with mama first, Y/N settled the little girl onto her hip before stepping onto the ice and starting to skate easy laps. 

***

“Green isn’t your color you know.” Matthew heard from over his shoulder as he attempted to puck handle with a child’s stick. Gio just laughed at the grimace on Matthew’s face as he skated off to break up a disagreement with his kids and Matthew cursed softly before turning back to watch Y/N doing up Lottie’s skates before stepping onto the ice with her. Skating slow laps, Matty watched as the little girl smiled and relaxed against her mom before eventually squirming to be put down a few minutes later. 

After taking off the little girl’s skate guards and sticking them in her back pocket, she gently set Lottie down and half squatted slowly skating the little girl forward. A screech of excitement left the toddler’s mouth and Matt’s chest started aching at the thought of wanting something he couldn’t have. They made it around a quarter of the rink before it appeared that Lottie had tired out and Y/N scooped her back up. 

“M. Chuck!!!!” Matt’s eyes went wide hearing Lottie scream out in excitement having just spotted him and suddenly Y/N had skated to his side, Lottie waving at him a shy smile on her face. 

“Hey, Matt.” Y/N greeted. “Someone wanted to come say hi.” Lottie rambled on for a minute or so and while Matt would like to say he was listening, he couldn’t take his eyes off of Y/N and the way she watched her daughter filled with so much love and affection. 

“Hey Y/N. Hey Lottie.” He eventually replied, shoving his hands in his pockets in an attempt to keep himself from running them through his hair. “I wasn’t sure if you were coming to this thing…” He found himself stating, only to see Y/N shrug. 

“Like we’d miss this. Skating is one of Lottie’s favorite things to do. I’ve been skating with her since she was two months old.” Though he didn’t intend to, Matt must have given her some sort of look because Y/N continued to explain. “Living in downtown Calgary it’s not so easy to go for late-night drives when she wouldn’t sleep so we started doing late night skates instead. I know a person or two…so we’d get into a rink and I’d strap her to my chest and start skating and before I knew it she was out like a light.” Lottie’s fingers were tangled in her mother’s hair and she shifted restlessly. 

“Skate and talk?” Y/N proposed and suddenly Matt was skating easy laps beside her, unable to deny the desire to be close to her. “So yeah we’ve been skating together for a long time but today was her first time on skates herself and I think she did pretty well.” A mumbled ‘tell dada’ could be heard from Lottie’s head buried in Y/N’s shoulder and Y/N laughed softly. 

“And she can’t wait to tell her dad all about it.” Matthew wanted to ask, it was eating him up inside but he just couldn’t. Instead, he swallowed hard, trying to find something neutral to say. Before he could though, Y/N yawned, a sneaky grin taking over her face. “But hopefully that’s later today than we had originally planned and he takes my advice on asking the hot guy in his seminar out for coffee.” 

Matty hadn’t even realized that he’d just stopped skating at her words until she turned around and started laughing ten feet in front of him, a glint in her eyes. He didn’t know it, but while skating with him, Y/N had been processing over Chris’s words about Matt being jealous over and over until finally, it all clicked. As she skated back to him, bumping him with her shoulder she glanced up to see the confusion on his face. 

“Chris is gay Matt.” She simply stated. “We were friends who got way too drunk and slept together fueled by the alcohol, stress, and loneliness. He told me the morning after that he’d been gay since high school and that while he loved me as a friend the night before had been a one-time thing. I wasn’t in love with him either…don’t get me wrong I love him as a friend just not more…so I was cool with it. Six weeks later he held me as we waited on a little piece of plastic to reveal our future. He’s been by my side since and we share custody of her. He’s the perfect co-parent and we still hang out every other week to talk about boys and drink wine.” 

Matt felt like a bomb had just been dropped on his brain as he processed her words and their implications. Her baby daddy was gay…which meant that she was single. All of the little fractures of his heart suddenly healed and he felt his cheeks heat up, his crush reaching a new level. At some point, they had started skating again, though Matt couldn’t remember when that had happened, but he did hear Lottie’s murmurings for her mama to skate faster and faster. 

“I don’t think mama can skate much faster Charlotte…” Y/N eventually stated, her voice a little more breathless from exertion. “But maybe if you ask Mr. Tkachuk nicely he’d skate you around a little faster. He’s a much better skater than mama.” 

Matt didn’t stand a chance against those big brown eyes and the soft ‘peas’ that fell from her lips as she looked up at him. Still, Matt wasn’t sure that he was ready for this. Sitting and reading to her was one thing, but he was worried that she’d end up hurt if he took her for a skate. It wasn’t until Y/N rested her hand gently on his arm and mouthed ‘I trust you’ that he acquiesced, gathering the toddler in his arms, getting her settled before he started off slowly, gradually gaining speed. 

The sound of Lottie’s laughter filling his ears brought his confidence up and soon he was skating as quickly as was safe around the crowded rink, tiny fingers tangled in his hoodie as she clung to him. He honestly lost track of time skating with her but as he started slowing, skating a final lap, he found himself shifting her so that her skates were back on the ice and he was holding her by the waist, his previous momentum carrying them both forward. The little girl seemed to love this even more and by the time they finally stopped back in front of the bench where Y/N was standing, Matt couldn’t describe the feeling filling his chest. 

The ice had started to clear and it was evident that Y/N was ready to go because she had her street shoes on already. As he handed Lottie back to her mom, the little girl thanked him repeatedly, her eyes already starting to droop. 

“Thanks, Matt.” Y/N murmured, using one hand to unlace her daughter’s skates, gently tugging them off her feet. “I’m sure Chris will also say thanks because she is going to sleep really well for him tonight.” She added laughing. Matt nodded and shrugged because it wasn’t that big of a deal. He watched as she packed her things up to head home, following her down the tunnel until the hallway parted. 

He wanted to make a move, wanted to ask her out but for some reason even knowing she was single he was too anxious to actually admit his feelings out loud. Shoving his hands back in his pockets he started for the dressing room until once again her voice called out to him. 

“Hey, Matt…” She started. “Chris has Lottie until Saturday morning…” The words were thrown out there with no real meaning and it wasn’t until she had walked away that it clicked and if he did a fist pump well…at least no one saw him. 

She was interested. Now he just had to get her number. 


End file.
